Building belonging
No community, or college campus, is immune from conflict, but within the Office of the Dean of Students at Boston College, a grassroots initiative centered around restorative practices is helping students strengthen their relationships, reflect on their experiences, and when necessary, repair harm—one circle at a time.
If you’ve never heard of restorative practices before, you’re not alone. A framed placard in the office’s waiting area offers a simple definition: they are, it explains, a set of tools used to help navigate disagreements and build community by “focusing on listening, understanding, and problem-solving, rather than blame or punishment.” While still relatively new on college campuses, restorative practices have been used in criminal justice settings for decades, and can be traced to ancient indigenous and aboriginal peacemaking practices.
One of the most common ways that restorative practices are implemented at Boston College is through community circles, which bring groups of 8-10 students together for structured conversations around specific issues or themes. Circles are run by trained facilitators who ask a series of questions depending on the topic while ensuring each participant has a chance to respond without interruption. Unlike a typical back-and-forth conversation, the circle format encourages individuals to share their own feelings without the pressure to respond to what others have said.
“It really defies our normal communication where I might feel the need to agree or disagree with you, and I think that’s what makes it so powerful,” said Vice President and Dean of Students Corey Kelly. “You don’t get into debates because you’re coming from a place of just authentically sharing and listening and trying to understand each other.”
Kelly’s office first introduced restorative practices to the BC community in 2020, and hosted a three-day training for the wider community a few years later. Today, staff in Mission and Ministry facilitate circles during retreats, coaches use them to strengthen Division I sports teams, and faculty have begun integrating them into their classes. The Office of the Dean of Students regularly facilitates circles for students to discuss shared experiences, such as being the first in their families to attend college.
Resident assistants attended a training on restorative practices in January.
“Those have been really powerful,” said Associate Dean of Student Conduct Melissa Hunt, who wrote her dissertation on restorative practices last year. “I remember a first generation circle where students shared feeling pressure to make their families proud, and believing they were the only ones to feel that way. Hearing other folks express the same sentiment helps increase their feeling of belonging.”
Last fall, Kelly and Hunt co-taught a Capstone Seminar for seniors on restorative practices and the power of circles to foster deep connection and reflection. They called it “Building Community for the Common Good,” and instead of traditional lectures or small group discussions, they used circles as their format. Every week, students practiced running circles on different topics related to community, like friendship, grief, and joy, gaining experience as facilitators and participants.
“Initially it was a bit funny, because I don’t think anyone in our class knew each other coming in,” said Kelley Knox ’26, a communication major pursuing a career in elementary education. “But by the third or fourth week it became a space where we could talk about our lives and how we felt about particular topics and experiences. We were able to talk like friends, and ultimately we did become friends.”
For their final project, members of the class worked together to plan, promote, and host a community circle for first-year students called “Perfect advice from imperfect seniors.” John Coughlin ’26, an accounting and finance major, invited first-year members of the Boston College Investment Club to attend. In his final paper, he explored the ways that restorative practices could be used in investment banking, the field he’ll be entering after graduation.
“It was an interesting thought exercise because they seem like two different worlds,” he said, “but I found so many uses for restorative practices and just open talking in the investment banking industry, which is somewhat cutthroat. If I were given the opportunity to lead a team in the future, I would definitely want to implement them.”
Recently, Kelly’s office added a new position focused on expanding the use of restorative practices across campus, particularly in the residence halls, where roommate squabbles and other conflicts often originate. Training resident assistants in the use of community circles and restorative dialogue—a facilitated conversation between two parties—could help them handle disagreements as they arise, or prevent them entirely.
Occasionally, Hunt will facilitate a circle in response to a conduct violation, when she feels the responsible party is willing to listen and take accountability. In those cases, the questions are almost always the same: What happened? What were you thinking at the time? What have you thought about since? And what can be done to repair the harm? Restorative practices have not replaced official sanctions, but they have emerged as a powerful complement that encourages everyone involved to examine the root of their feelings and determine how they want to move forward.
“It’s working against the shame and blame that we often are tempted by as a society—wanting to yell, or make someone feel bad,” said Kelly. “Restorative practices invite something totally different: How do we actually see the humanity in all of us, how do we understand people’s perspectives, and how do we actually have a meaningful dialogue?"