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Lessons from Joan: Living and Loving with Cancer,
a Husband’s Story
by Eric Kingson
(2005, Syracuse University)
Lessons from Joan is a compassionate and loving account of
a woman’s struggle with colon cancer that is beautifully
written by her husband, Eric. It is a poignant example of
how spouses and caregivers of cancer patients can receive
from their ill partners as much as they give—at times
even more. Perhaps Eric states it best when he writes that
the book is about “living and dying with dignity, hope,
and humor. And how doing so enriches many lives and helps
with the healing of those left behind.”
For 32 months, Eric and his wife, Joan, rode the emotional
roller coaster of cancer—a ride of despair and hope.
Through the ordeal they tried to put the cancer into perspective.
They communicated openly about it but at the same time did
not let it dominate their lives nor the lives of their teenage
daughter and son. Humor was often used to help smooth the
ride and examples are interspersed throughout the book. For
example, during a visit to the specialty shop for cancer patients
at the hospital, they decided to rename the store “The
Shop ‘Til You Drop Store.” Loving and supportive
family members, friends, and co-workers also lessened the
stress of the trip.
While it is not a “how to” book, Kingson’s
extensive notes on things they did to advocate for Joan’s
treatment provide practical advice for cancer patients and
their partners. “Negotiating Cancer” and “Tools
for Making the System Work” are two appendices that
contain this valuable information.
Although Joan’s cancer was colon and not breast, this
book is relevant and valuable to any couple coping with the
cancer experience. More information about the book can be
found on the Syracuse University Website - --
http://www.syracuseuniversitypress.syr.edu/fall-2005-catalog/lessons-joan.html
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