Ever since the womens movement first articulated the concept of battering, feminists have grappled with the issue of what the problem should be called. Each of the possible termswife abuse, spouse abuse, domestic violence, intimate violence, wife battering, or women abusereflects a different perception of battering. Is the critical determinant marriage, gender, familial relationship, intimacy, or physical violence?
Schneider, supra note 17, at 60.
A custody battle is the quintessential power struggle between men and women. Its about who controls a womans mind and body. Its also about who gets to control the future. Children are the future. Men think of children as the necessary chains to keep wives from flying away. If we fly away anyway, they transfer their needs to the children.
Children learn several lessons in witnessing the abuse of one of their parents. First, they learn that such behavior appears to be approved by their most important role models and that the violence toward a loved one is acceptable. Children also fail to grasp the full range of negative consequences for the violent behavior and observe, instead, the short term reinforcements, namely compliance by the victim.