Fake, Funny, and Foolish
april fools items from the heights archives
At Boston College, the only real record of April Fools' activities comes from the Heights, the student newspaper. Since it began operations in 1919, the Heights has published, in editions close to or on April 1, numerous jokes and fake news articles. Here are some samples and excerpts, in random order, from 1950 to 2009. These examples provide an interesting glimpse of life at BC and the context in which students lived at various times. (Since 1970, the Heights has been an independent organization and all samples and images from issues since that time are with permission of the Heights. Click here to view the most recent edition of the Heights and here for information on how to subscribe.)
April 1, 1966
April 1, 2008
April 1, 1950
ALL THE NEWS THEY’LL LET US PRINT
Top High School Athlete
In West Will Attend BC
The Heights has received exclusive information that Greg Duzzall, 6 sport letterman at Los Angeles Central High, will enroll at Boston College.
. . .
However, being a serious student, Mr. Duzzall will devote full time to his B.S. Flyswatting course.
. . .
He was influenced in his choice by the B.C. Club of the Far West (this includes Worcester Mass.).
April 1, 2002 – in a special annual section entitled “The Depths”
April 1, 2009
April 1, 1955
April 1, 1960
Four Lads Accept Bid to Sing at
‘Coolest’ Junior Week Jazz Show
By George Higgins (Class of 1961, JD’67; attorney and best-selling author, e.g., Friends of Eddie Coyle; died 1999)
In what must surely rank as the most startling statement given in Chestnut Hill since the news of the capture of San Juan Hill was announced, Mr. John McCormack today disclosed that the Junior Week Jazz Show is “just about ready to go,” to use his own fortuitous phrase.
Mr. McCormack, who heads the committee concerned with the show, and who will be remembered as the man who shot Dillinger, remarked that a good deal of work had been done on the event, although he modestly refused to name names, blushing a little as he did so. He noted the hope of the committee, that reasonable enthusiasm is expected, and expressed the opinion that suitable means for enforcing such zeal are near at hand.
. . .
Boors, Bores, and Boarders Vie
For First Annual Philistine Award
Members of the Selection Committee announced this week that the first annual Philistine of the Year Award will be presented at a banquet following the spring holidays. The purpose of this prize will be to encourage genteel boorishness and stifled thinking. . . .
April 1, 2004